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The Legend Of Tyrant I'm trying a new fanfic.

#1   cyberRoll 

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    Posted 12 February 2005 - 07:32 PM

    Chapter: One
    The Legend Begins


    Not Many people know the unknown. Not all of them can walk up the street and tell you a tale. A legend. A Legend of a boy. The Legend of Tyrant. Tyrant was but a young boy when the SFIL, The Science For Interuniversal Living, took him from his home. They removed him from his family only at the age of 7. They removed him from his home, his family, his life.The drive to the SFIL company was long and hard. The drive of which began his miserable life. The torture began on that cramped truck the painful injections were given to him. He would receive more than 6 injections of a very concentrated solution. A solution never intended to be tested on humans. The gaps of pain would not entertains the impassible scientists. 3 times an hour they would put him in a freezer an oven or an electric enviroment. taking notes constantly on how the solution made him react. Slowly and steadily Tyrant became more than human...

    He was forced to endure the tortures of this scientific activity. He grew up more rapidly than even the scientists and unlike them, his bones did not begin to wither away. He grew into his adolescence eventually.Execpt he was mor than teen....

    Scientists were proud of what they had created.They were stunned at the increases of his mental and physical abilitys. But little did they know he was growing smarter than them. And he would soon outsmart them in one of their own activities.

    One fateful day, when Tyrant was receiving his injections, he mysteriously disappeared during the third one. "If all goes as planned." He thought to himself, "everyone I have met in this torture house shall die today." He thought still "All the scars thoughtlessly cast apon my body shall now have a cause." Tyrant appeared in front of the scientist holding the needle. Tyrant stared him in the eyes and soon the scientist holding the needle burst into flames. His cries for pain enticed Tyrant. " And now you yell the gasps of pain you cast upon me when I was a child. Now I'm on the laughing side." Slowly all 280 scientists on the 'Tyrant Project' Died slow horrible deaths related to the ones they shed apon Tyrant.

    When Tyrant was finally outside it was raining. " How Mellow dramatic" He said. He didn't plan what would happen after the deaths of the scientists and so he sat to a tree. Constantly getting wet, he did nothing. He sat there remembering what one of the late scientists said, ' He can make his own food now, but he's not plant like in anyways.' He merely laughed at the thought. " My own food." He thought over and over again. Now What to do? He Just sat there doing absolutely nothing. All he could do was sit.
    Chapter one Complete

    So what do you think?

    #2   Lind 

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      Posted 12 February 2005 - 08:46 PM

      Pretty good, I'm pretty interested, but you need to do some proof reading. You made some odd grammar and spelling mistakes pretty much through the whole thing. Aside from that, Tyrant sounds like a pretty messed-up character from the beginning. I like it.

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        Posted 13 February 2005 - 09:30 AM

        ok chapter 2 is coming later.

        #4   Isaac13 

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          Posted 04 March 2005 - 03:55 PM

          cyberRoll nedds replies gys so get replying!!

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            Posted 04 March 2005 - 04:59 PM

            I13 is right. anyway, chapter 2

            Chapter: Two
            The Woman in the Rain


            Refreshment from Chapter: one

            When Tyrant was finally outside it was raining. " How Mellow dramatic" He said. He didn't plan what would happen after the deaths of the scientists and so he sat to a tree. Constantly getting wet, he did nothing. He sat there remembering what one of the late scientists said, ' He can make his own food now, but he's not plant like in any ways.' He merely laughed at the thought. " My own food." He thought over and over again. Now What to do? He Just sat there doing absolutely nothing. All he could do was sit.
            Chapter one Complete


            Tyrant looked back at the tree he was sitting in front of. "How do you make food?" He felt stupid. Then he paused. Listening closely he heard horse- no footsteps. Looking not needing to squint,He saw a little girl. Well at least she looked little from far away. Closer up she appeared to be about his height and age. Maybe younger. Tyrant was only 15 right now. She appeared 13-15 He couldn't tell yet.

            When she was closer maybe a 2 or 3 yards away, Tyrant got a better glimpse of her face. She had blonde hair, Dark gray (grey) eyes a small rounded nose and bright cherry colored lips. When she was one yard away she saw him.

            She ran up to him. " Hi there my name is Aqua." " What in the world kind of name is Aqua?" Tyrant hatefully replied. " You don't want to get me mad. You won't like me when I'm mad." She said in a threatening tone. " Oh was that a threat? I've heard better threats from a nerd!!" He bitterly replied. Her face was getting red. She looked so mad she could just, well, burst. Suddenly, She reached her arm out as if she was going to choke him. Her arm stretched out and broke up into a form of liquid when it touched you it would 'grasp' you.

            She 'grabbed' Tyrant with the form of liquid. The liquid was boiling hot. But with being in an enviroment where you had to like walk on and eat flames , Tyrant was used to this. But what Tyrant was not used to was being squeezed so much his bones broke every thirty seconds and on top of that, being smashed on the ground with the same force every five seconds, Tyrant was in immense pain. She smacked him against the tree and hit him against the ground and left him sitting there.

            Her face un-distorted. "Now then are you hungry?" Aqua asked. Tyrant flinched and spoke like a gasp for life with every word. " I.... don't..... need...... food..." "Nonsense!" She laughed. "Here have some bread." Tyrant flinched again " I.... said........I.... don't..... need...... food....." She was getting mad. Then she cooled down ' maybe your not hungry maybe your thirsty. C'mon I know where the nearest town is." She said so her arm liquified again and she dragged him. Tyrant could feel his bones reforming and snapping into place. " Gah! I don't need water its raining! And I nee-" " Oh sorry my fault." She snapped her fingers the rain stopped. " You were saying?" Tyrant didn't' seem impressed. ' After all her name is Aqua' Her grasp tightened Tyrnant's bones began breaking again. " You were saying?!" Gasping for life Tyrant continued " I... ned...... A..... Hos... i .... tal." When Tyrant finished he passed out.


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