Yuki's Poetry Please tell me what you think...
#1
Posted 04 July 2005 - 02:16 AM
The Story Of Madonna
She sits upon presents and gifts given by admierers galore
Upon her lap there sits a boy but wait, there's so much more
For within this painting lies the story of pain, of grief, of cries
A hole deep down, dug out of her
Life torn from his little hands
Gifts thrown
Life torn
Not able to meet demands
The heart they shared was torn out
The life no longer lived the wounds that didn't seem to heal
The tresspasses never forgived
The only emotions left to see is the emptyness, pain, and misery
This is the burden of a mother's pain
No wings to help her fly
Her life shattered, cracked, and torn
Now her baby resides in the sky
^I did this poem to a painting by Salvador Dali titles 'Madonna Porté Lliggat'
Set Me Up
This lovey feeling causing war
And all you did was leave
Set up a bomb
Blew up my core
The blood's still on my sleeve
I long to choke the air out
I have a blood filled need
First to come and first to go
And never there to lead
You were a dead lover
Soul was cold and poor
Brush your pale face with my knife
Close your coffin door
^I was a bit depressed with the last two poems. I had to let it out and here's the result.
Never
Never leave never go
Always here to die
You pull me up push me down
These eyes can only cry
Here to back you up
Here to guide you right
Here to bring down my razors
Here to watch you die
Tell me what you think. Thanks!
#3
Posted 04 July 2005 - 11:14 AM
#4
Posted 04 July 2005 - 12:09 PM
Funeral Plans
Find me here my love
Come and dig me up
Catch me as I fall my dear
Show me some crimson love
Marry me
I'll be your corpse wife
Grab the fool
And use my bloody knife
I'll record it in my book
With all my thoughts and dreams
Throw it down and pick it up
Watch my pen kiss it's page
#6
Posted 04 July 2005 - 08:22 PM
#7
Posted 04 July 2005 - 09:00 PM
#9
Posted 04 July 2005 - 09:11 PM
I think of you
Every moment I can spare
Your name it whispers in the wind
And echoes into the air
Everytime I hear it
It's as clear as a bell
Matt...it says
And I wish you well
For I love you
With every ounce of my beating heart
I'll love you forever
And I don't want to ever part
*for Loz*
What do you think...? O__o;
#11
Posted 04 July 2005 - 10:40 PM
#12
Posted 05 July 2005 - 05:26 AM
#13
Posted 06 July 2005 - 02:20 AM
#14
Posted 06 July 2005 - 12:47 PM
i feel as fragile as a leaf in autumn...just falling to the ground...not making any sound but the lonely crinkle of my heart...
Well?
#15
Posted 08 July 2005 - 03:11 PM
#16
Posted 08 July 2005 - 05:12 PM
#17
Posted 08 July 2005 - 07:39 PM
I like the fact that you use your real life experiences to bring out beautiful descriptions.
9/10.
#18
Posted 14 July 2005 - 10:55 AM
DiddyKong, on Jul 8 2005, 01:11 PM, said:
..............apple yogurt? .-. Wow Diddy that's a first. No one has *EVER*, in my history of writing poetry, told me that my poems remind them of food. But thank you because now I finally have some inspiration ;D
#19
Posted 16 July 2005 - 05:09 AM
It's good that you have inspiration because of that. :lol:
It really reminded me of apple yoghurt...
(1000 posts, FINALY! ;) )
#21
Posted 22 July 2005 - 12:17 AM
Update~!
*S*U*R*P*R*I*S*E*
How do I laugh
When I only cry?
How can you still think
That I'm perfectly fine?
How am I pure
When I'm a pervert
And just how do my poems
Remind Diddy of yoghurt?!
#22
Posted 22 July 2005 - 02:21 AM
Love_Guardian_Yuki, on Jul 22 2005, 01:17 AM, said:
LOL awsome!
I like your poems alot, comming from someone so young and talking about love I find that your poems will only get better in time when relationships start getting more serious and deeper. (Except for any of those poor souls that get involved with Anubis)
LMFAO
#24
Posted 22 July 2005 - 10:53 AM
pHantOm, on Jul 22 2005, 01:21 AM, said:
Thanks Phantom that's so nice of you to say. And I like the last line too. Hey, I said he gave me imspiration didn't I? =]
#25
Posted 22 July 2005 - 12:39 PM
*Looks around* What? I can be nice.
#26
Posted 24 July 2005 - 05:31 PM
But seriously, they are nice, keep writing. I'm looking forward to your next ones.
#27
Posted 19 August 2005 - 10:48 AM
#29
Posted 20 August 2005 - 09:00 AM
#30
Posted 21 August 2005 - 02:43 AM
Love_Guardian_Yuki, on Jul 22 2005, 08:17 AM, said:
ROFL! :)
BEST POEM EVER!
Didn't reminded me of yoghurt though... Still it's great! :D
#33
Posted 21 August 2005 - 05:35 PM
#35
Posted 21 August 2005 - 09:39 PM
#36
Posted 22 August 2005 - 04:57 AM
I usualy think "The Monkeys" when I want to get happy.
Daydream beleiver:
Oh, I could hide 'neath the wings
Of the bluebird as she sings.
The six o'clock alarm would never ring.
But it rings and I rise,
Wipe the sleep out of my eyes.
My shavin' razor's cold and it stings.
Cheer up, Sleepy Jean.
Oh, what can it mean.
To a daydream believer
And a homecoming queen.
You once thought of me
As a white knight on a steed.
Now you know how happy I can be.
Oh, and our good times start and end
Without dollar one to spend.
But how much, baby, do we really need.
Oh, what can it mean.
To a daydream believer
And a homecoming queen.
Cheer up, Sleepy Jean.
#37
Posted 22 August 2005 - 08:28 AM
Love_Guardian_Yuki, on Aug 22 2005, 01:35 AM, said:
I wasn't meaning of making a fool of you.
Oh and by the way, this is the yoghurt your poems remind me from:
http://www.heidepoort.nl/pics/Produkten/Zuivel/Onken/Voorjaar%20yoghurt%20groene%20appel.jpg
#38
Posted 22 August 2005 - 01:30 PM
DiddyKong, on Aug 22 2005, 07:28 AM, said:
.___.;; sorry Dee Kay, omg that yoghurt? o_o I don't see how...
#39
Posted 28 August 2005 - 06:17 AM
#41
Posted 28 August 2005 - 10:48 PM
#42
Posted 29 August 2005 - 01:12 AM
#46
Posted 10 September 2005 - 03:56 PM
#47
Posted 17 September 2005 - 09:03 PM
Same Old Death
Here I am
Same old place
Same old smell
Same old taste
Back to this
Over and again
I keep wondering
When will it end
Same old feelings
Same old sound
of pain and screams
that fill my ears
So I'll fire my gun
And the bullet will lodge inside my brain
And I'll fall to the ground
And shiver in pain
And as I bleed
And my eyes roll back
I'll say "goodbye,"
As my world turns black
I kind of went with a new apporach >.< Sorry if you don't like it...
#48
Posted 17 September 2005 - 09:08 PM
#49
Posted 17 September 2005 - 09:18 PM
#50
Posted 17 September 2005 - 09:23 PM
Roses are red
violets are sort of blue
I want some candy
How about you?
Im an even better poet than yuki XD
#52
Posted 17 September 2005 - 09:52 PM
#53
Posted 17 September 2005 - 09:54 PM
C'mon, other people need to look at my newest entry too!! X_x
#54
Posted 17 September 2005 - 10:05 PM
#55
Posted 18 September 2005 - 01:12 AM
Love_Guardian_Yuki, on Sep 17 2005, 10:03 PM, said:
Same Old Death
Here I am
Same old place
Same old smell
Same old taste
Back to this
Over and again
I keep wondering
When will it end
Same old feelings
Same old sound
of pain and screams
that fill my ears
So I'll fire my gun
And the bullet will lodge inside my brain
And I'll fall to the ground
And shiver in pain
And as I bleed
And my eyes roll back
I'll say "goodbye,"
As my world turns black
I kind of went with a new apporach >.< Sorry if you don't like it...
I will respond for you Yuki. ;)
you are correct, it is emo lol. But I still find it to be really good, keep at it your doing great. Im really impressed by your writtings.
#56
Posted 18 September 2005 - 10:13 AM
I was like "*praying**thinks* OH SNAP THAT IS COOL!!!!!" lol XD
#57
Posted 18 September 2005 - 07:08 PM
#58
Posted 18 September 2005 - 07:12 PM
I should really start my own poetry topic
#59
Posted 18 September 2005 - 07:22 PM
Golden Djinn13, on Sep 18 2005, 08:12 PM, said:
I should really start my own poetry topic
I believe the topic stats "Yuki's Poetry" thus we focus on her work, not yours. ;)
And its ok Yuki, things can seem bad sometimes...but someone comes into your life and things seem so much better.
#60
Posted 18 September 2005 - 07:28 PM
#61
Posted 18 September 2005 - 07:38 PM
being serious now, im confused. Can someone explain
#62
Posted 18 September 2005 - 08:05 PM
Love_Guardian_Yuki, on Sep 18 2005, 08:28 PM, said:
When just being Emo and reality of what you are writing collide, you'll really rethink how things are going. And eventually you will meet someone that you care about and want to be with as much as possible. I really hope thats the case for you Yuki.
#63
Posted 18 September 2005 - 08:33 PM
#64
Posted 22 September 2005 - 03:24 PM
#65
Posted 23 September 2005 - 07:11 PM
#68
Posted 19 November 2005 - 02:28 AM
New Poem!
His love leaves me to cry
Alone inside my lonely mind
As i wipe the tears from my sore eyes
i wonder...
>x_iS HiS LoVe ReaLLY WoRTH iT...?
Chic-Chicky BOOM!
#69
Posted 22 November 2005 - 05:48 PM
#70
Posted 22 November 2005 - 07:59 PM
You're still got me
This time it will be different
This time I'll say no
Even though your eyes burn my soul
I'll refuse
I'll finally tell you
That your memory is gone
And that shouldn't make you move
Because I meant nothing
Even though I'm writing for you
This won't change me
I'll keep your opinions
And thrash my own
Because yours is the only one that matters
So I'll just stay here
And feel you
But I'll wash your kiss off my lips
And numb you from my fingertips
This is it
I'll bow down
Or rebel
I'll gag the ground you walk
And bleed my colors
You always did like blue
n.n;; Inspiration from a song my friend showed me from Spill Canvas (All Hail The Heartbreaker)
This post has been edited by Love_Guardian_Yuki: 24 November 2005 - 05:35 PM
#71
Posted 24 November 2005 - 09:31 PM
#72
Posted 24 November 2005 - 11:21 PM
#73
Posted 25 November 2005 - 08:41 PM
#74
Posted 25 November 2005 - 09:15 PM
#75
Posted 26 November 2005 - 01:08 PM
I have not heard of these things of which you speak, all I want is some more POETRY!!!eleven!!!111!
#76
Posted 29 November 2005 - 11:07 AM
#77
Posted 30 November 2005 - 06:01 PM
#78
Posted 30 November 2005 - 08:14 PM
Black Duality && White Cheats
Black Hearts
White Lies
Red Lips
Green Ties
Blue Soul-Dark and cold
Never Ending
Out of Control
Peach Cheeks
Violet Eyes
Maroon Tongue
Pink Cries
Leave
Through the flames
I saw your face
Smirking...laughing
I'll kill you
Your are not me
But I can see it
Your face, your laugh, your love
Burned into my retinas
Stuck in my memory
Can I erase you?
Can I leave it alone?
If I nurse my wounds,
Will they heal?
Or will they scar me
Like you did?
Why can't I leave it alone?
Get out of my head
Cause all I can think of is
You
Euphoria [X]
Euphoria creeping in
Euphoria gone
My solution to your problems
My medicine to your sickness
Me to you
Tell me, show me, give me
My daily dose of Euphoria [X]
>.<; Kinda lame, since I came up with it that last two days </3
This post has been edited by Love_Guardian_Yuki: 30 November 2005 - 08:15 PM
#79
Posted 02 December 2005 - 01:26 PM
is that supposed to be like that or? does sound good, but it confuses me heavily....
rest is quite good though, the one with the all the colours ecspecially
#80
Posted 02 December 2005 - 11:07 PM
Thanks. Color one was easy =D
umm...yeah my poetry tends to even confuse me xD
#82
Posted 19 December 2005 - 10:02 AM
I think I came up with that one in math class XD
#84
Posted 21 December 2005 - 05:49 AM
Love_Guardian_Yuki, on Dec 3 2005, 04:07 PM, said:
Yuki, your poetry is good and all, but if you don't have a real reason to write about something, it's not exactly real poetry. Poetry is all about expressing yourself and making a statement to the world, not just firing off lines which sound cool together.
Although, nobody would expect something of that calibre from a 14-year-old. So keep up the good work!
#86
Posted 21 December 2005 - 12:52 PM
"Emo" is my excuse
and reason
go back a few pages
a read what's there
it's personal intenntions, and sentimental reasons -.-;;
thankyouverymuch come again
and thanks PDM ^^
#89
Posted 21 December 2005 - 10:05 PM
Okay, since it's Winter Break, i'll come up with some stuff =3
#90
Posted 21 December 2005 - 10:46 PM
#92
Posted 22 December 2005 - 03:56 PM
First it rained
Then it poured
MD's hamster then let out a fit of snores
Now it's time to go
Wait...
WHAT HAPPENED TO MD'S SNOW?! i.i
MD added the hamster line XD
#93
Posted 22 December 2005 - 03:58 PM
#94
Posted 22 December 2005 - 04:02 PM
Guranteed more stuff tomorrow, if my creative organ decides to work x.x;
#95
Posted 22 December 2005 - 10:02 PM
For every little thing you are
I dedicate me
Despite the thrills
And the kills for words
I request my soul
To be played
Remixed with yours
I dedicate my whole life
To letting me love you
Cause the gentle tap
Of your heart against your veins
Is tuning the strings of mine
You're everything
My therapist prescribed
Do they have you in pill form?
I'd take an overdose
Just to have a part of you
Breathing into a part of me
They think I'm crazy
But to let you in on a little secret
I've never been so sane
You're the crazy one
Crazy enough to see me through
Like it? >.<
This post has been edited by Love_Guardian_Yuki: 22 December 2005 - 10:03 PM
#97
Posted 23 December 2005 - 03:25 PM
You just can't see
What you're doing to me
That this feeling inside
Is tearing me up
That the life you led
Is haunting mine
And your image
Just refuses to leave my head
All I can do
Is wait it out
And let it unravell
Like the ribbon around my neck
Slowly stealing the air
That you used to infect
I'll just keep rhyming lines
With the vowels from your name
What rhymes with
'I Love You'?
>.< another random Winter Break poem~
#98
Posted 25 December 2005 - 07:25 AM
Just keep on training and one day you might become a great poem writer
#99
Posted 25 December 2005 - 10:25 PM
#100
Posted 27 December 2005 - 09:08 PM
This post has been edited by lightningstar: 27 December 2005 - 09:08 PM
#102
Posted 16 January 2006 - 09:41 AM
Or something like that. Wow I haven't visited this topic in some time and I felt kinda guilty for Yukachu so here I am n.n
No Habla English was pretty good, keep it up! :D
#103
Posted 27 January 2006 - 08:16 PM
Dry cough, rich blood. Everything is just as it is. Nothing could ever be wrong. In such a dream there is no color just grey and black with a blotch of white. We run through this animation everytime you watch. Play, pause, rewind, fastforeward. Break the replay button because going through this act just kills the script. Our director is the one that tells us when to bleed. But that doesn't matter because our pain seems fake. That's all we seem to be: walking, breathing, harbors of pain disguised in a silent movie where the lines are all you can read. The actors move in grace and skill so fast that you can barely see the lines their souls leave. Unknown titles and unknown idea create the space we disturb. Playing on the innuendos and the swinging in the paint. Invert the colors and all you get is confusion mixed with a sore neck. 90 degrees more to the right and you would have seen the X. You need a hobby: what about digging up holes? Let's make them 7 feet deep with extra space to hide the evidence. No matter what the gun says the bullet's words are much more important. It's almost time to swim in bleach. A break from this camera life. I'm cutting this connection because the battery just gave out.
#104
Posted 28 January 2006 - 08:32 PM
anyways, thats absolutely amazing. I don't quite understand, but I can definately sense pain and anguish or what seems a lack thereof. I can sense that these are words that write a story of your feelings; words only you can understand. Brilliant!
#105
Posted 28 January 2006 - 08:48 PM
And the 7 feet thing...means "bury a body"
I know, it's kinda morbid-y
But I've been reading up on Edgar Allen Poe and Sylvia Plath and they just made new ideas explode in my head x_x
If you swim in bleach you'll die...o.O
And the::
"The bullet's words are more important"
means
that like, if you put a gun on a table and leave it there it won't do anything but if you shoot it then the bullet is the one that does the damage. I know it's really confusing xD;
#106
Posted 28 January 2006 - 08:53 PM
And yeah there is some pretty ****ed up stuff there for a 14 year old girl to be writing about, takes you emo-ness to a whole new level.
#107
Posted 28 January 2006 - 09:04 PM
I know it's 6 feet
"7 feet with extra space to hide the evidence"
:P I knew you'd say something about 'emo-ness'
#108
Posted 29 January 2006 - 01:21 PM
On a completely unrealated note, why don't I see's you on AIM anymore?
#109
Posted 22 March 2006 - 05:50 PM
You say you're right
You think he's stupid
I think he's nice
You want me to make the choice of a lifetime and you want me to choose...
Between the one that I love
and the one that hurts the one who
Forgot me and loved her first
the one who makes rain fall down everyday of my life
but I'm stuck between you and my Mr. Right.
O: start of the song I'm trying to write. Simple rhymes. Now I need a tune and a second verse :@
Funny thing is that I wrote this last night before I went to sleep :P
#110
Posted 30 March 2006 - 06:47 AM
I've got a poem, think I should share it? I suppose I will, its about long distance relationships, Love poem but hey whatever right? I wrote it before valentines day. I wrote this, because I could not be with her on Valentines Day. No stolen lyrics from songs, all written on my own. Im not trying to hijack your thread Yuki, I just want to share mine with you real quick. >_<
-Valentines Day-
Im sitting here in my cold dark room
Your gift from me is comming soon
One dozen roses and all the love I have
You are the only Valentine i've ever had
All I want is to not be lonely
When I dream of you, I feel so empty
There is no sound or smell, and I never hear your voice
Yet I smile, and couldnt be happier
Distance drowns me, as time holds me down
Only your smile gives me life, without it im gone
I jump in my car, with you in my heart
As I drive I feel you holding on tight
But the world pulls you away
I try to grab your hand
But I pass right through you
As you fade away and disappear
#112
Posted 07 April 2006 - 10:06 PM
"A white rabbit in grey world. I'm her mad hatter. She's the one with time cutting air from around her throat."
:D
#113
Posted 13 April 2006 - 08:59 AM
#114
Posted 27 May 2006 - 11:19 AM
Ack x_X I wrote new poetry but it's about a cultural sturggle..will edit it and post it later X_x;;
#115
Posted 28 May 2006 - 10:49 AM
"A very happy unbirthday, to me? to you!"
#118
Posted 06 June 2006 - 11:14 AM
I just didn't understand the meaning at first, but after reading it a couple of times, I get it.
Hey, I'll take some of that tea! *sips*
#119
Posted 10 July 2006 - 08:13 AM
you were next
and it's no joke sweetie
they're comming for you and me
and we'll just have to wait
and slowly dissapate
and dissapear with the rest of the crowd
it doesn't matter that they've got nightmares
and snares
they'll take our dreams
and burn them in fires blazing
I'm sure it won't hurt
as long as we're dreaming
victims in the wake
and criminals in the sleep
but don't worry;
we'll break free
just like we did last time
x.X this is the result of being bored at...7:20 am n.n;
#120
Posted 14 July 2006 - 04:53 PM
if I said I didn't miss you
Every moment I could
Your return is overdue
I'm begging
Come back
This time it got personal
I need you back here with me
I hope this message
Hits the airwaves
and haunts you in your dreams sweetie
when you play those soft melodies
and my subliminal charm
going away was your sorrow
begging was mine
Dx likey?
#121
Posted 17 August 2006 - 12:52 AM
The place where
I won't be backstabbed
and kicked when i'm down
the place where I can smile
and not be pulled down by some negative force
I want to be where razors don't exsist
and tears are a distant dream
where wings are not broken
and smiles never fade
I want to be with friends
Friends who love me
Friends who make me love being alive
I want to be with a person
that makes me love waking up in the morning
and who i think about
day and night
i want to be in serenity
and bliss
and be in a euphoric state of mind
this is where I want to be
#122
Posted 07 June 2007 - 10:07 PM
HISS. it hurts.
The sizzle of skin.
Stop the sensation
The fire that's been.
Personal arson on something so dead
Frictional start to a fiery end.
It's just a scorch, some bandage will do
Melted skin like globbing glue
Instant pull as sparks fly
A burning flight crashing into the sky
A tiny spark
A little gleam
It starts up fast
And spreads like a disease
Some stand by and watch
Some try to fight
Some come out coughing
From the smokey site
Some come out as heros
Some come out in bags
A deadly sacrifice for a natural trend
They happen each year
Like Clockwork's hand
Just a rejuvenating storm
To kill perished land
We're fighting with fire with gas
And also with water
Helictopers in flight carrying dead firemen martyrs
We don't let it happen
We break off it's course
Changing natures work
To a blazing force.
It has to happen, why can't they see?
Brush needs to die to give life to the tree.
---
Talking about how we've been fighting nature's natural ways of reprodcing dead plants. Brush fires.
Blargh. I'm not in the mood to explain. If you want a REAL explanantion, come join my philosophy class =P
#124
Posted 08 June 2007 - 05:26 PM
#125
Posted 08 June 2007 - 05:47 PM
#127
Posted 21 April 2008 - 06:09 PM
One is heads.
One is tails.
Toss it, and you only get one.
However you land is how you will be seen.
But what if
You threw the coin
And it landed on it's middle?
Can't touch the ground with either side?
50/50 and I still only add up to 25 cents.
We live in a wallet world.
Some are pennies.
Some are silver dollars.
I'm the dirty coin you scrunch your nose at and don't want
To touch.
You're only half they say.
You're not even full.
Your struggle isn't real.
Closure is what I wanted.
I needed to know I wasn't alone.
But in the end,
I'm still a fraction.
Still a percentage.
Do you see a dirty white girl?
Or a failed attempt at Asian?
Am I white on yellow?
Or yellow on white?
Wallflower all my life.
The future will be mixed.
There is no such thing as purity.
Keep your coins.
I want change.
Not supposed to rhyme.
It's spoken word.
And freestance.
>_<
#128
Posted 21 April 2008 - 06:15 PM
#129
Posted 22 April 2008 - 09:27 PM
The forest fire one hit me the most; here in Arizona we see quite a few forest fires, and in my town I think I've personally seen 3. It was sad, though, to see such beauty be destroyed by a fire, but when you think about the rebirth, it's comforting.
Keep up the good work, you're a natural!
#130
Posted 30 April 2008 - 02:21 AM
Yuki, on Apr 21 2008, 05:09 PM, said:
One is heads.
One is tails.
Toss it, and you only get one.
However you land is how you will be seen.
But what if
You threw the coin
And it landed on it's middle?
Can't touch the ground with either side?
50/50 and I still only add up to 25 cents.
We live in a wallet world.
Some are pennies.
Some are silver dollars.
I'm the dirty coin you scrunch your nose at and don't want
To touch.
You're only half they say.
You're not even full.
Your struggle isn't real.
Closure is what I wanted.
I needed to know I wasn't alone.
But in the end,
I'm still a fraction.
Still a percentage.
Do you see a dirty white girl?
Or a failed attempt at Asian?
Am I white on yellow?
Or yellow on white?
Wallflower all my life.
The future will be mixed.
There is no such thing as purity.
Keep your coins.
I want change.
Not supposed to rhyme.
It's spoken word.
And freestance.
>_<
@#$%
that was depressing. impressive, yet depressing ):