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After The Adventure

#1   FSOW11 

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    • Interests:Golden Sun of course, Final Fantasy, Legend of Drgoon, The Legend Of Zelda, music, video games, SoulCalibur 2.

    Posted 29 June 2004 - 12:00 PM

    After The Adventure:

    Chapter 1- New Arrivals

    It is 4 years after GS: TLA. Isaac and Jenna are in the delivery room. In just a few minutes. Isaac would emerge with the new baby. Garet, Ivan, and Felix, Mia, and Piers were outsidehe delivery room betting on stuff about the baby. "I'll bet you 10 coins that the baby's gonna be a Mars Adept," Garet says as he puts 10 coins on their betting table. "I'll bet you 60 coins that baby's gonna be a girl." Mia says and places 60 coins on the table. "I'll bet you 100 coins that the baby's gonna have blonde hair." Ivan says and puts 100 coins on the betting table. Isaac and Jenna are in the delivery room kissing each other as the baby came. It had blonde hair, blue eyes and was a boy. As he was cradling the baby in his arms, Jenna screamed as a second baby came. They were twins! Te second baby was a girl and had red hair and brown eyes. "What shall we name them?" Jenna asks. "Jake and Anna," Isaac says. Jenna immediately falls in love with the names. They come out of the delivery room and Isaac says "Jake and Anna." A village elder walks up and places one hand on each baby. "The boy is a Venus Adept and the girl is a Mars Adept." he says and walks away. "What!? He had twins!" Garet shouts in surprise. "Well, I guess that we all get our money back!" Felix says and grabs his portion of the money.

    #2   MysticWarrior 

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      • AKA Horasu

      Posted 30 June 2004 - 02:41 PM

      Okay, I have a few suggestions:

      Every time a person speaks, make a new paragraph.

      Paragraphs are your friends.

      Make the chapters longer.

      #3   catastrophe 

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        Posted 15 July 2004 - 10:28 AM

        hmmmm...needs more plot.


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