[Laharl]

stumbled across this, and all i can say os oh dear

http://209.85.165.104/search?q=cache:http%...x%3Farchive%3D1

"No, everyone is born Christian. Only later in life do people choose to stray from Jesus and worship satan instead. Atheists have the greatest "cover" of all, they insist they believe in no god yet most polls done and the latest research indicates that they are actually a different sect of Muslims."

"Athiests as a Majority

This is what it would be like, if the majority of people were athiests.
ATHIEST KID: Mom, I'm going to go **** a hooker.
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, son.
ATHIEST KID: Afterwards, I'm going to go smoke pot with my friends, since it's "not addictive."
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, come home soon!

The athiest kid leaves the room. The father comes home from work several minutes later.

ATHIEST DAD: Hey!
ATHIEST MOM: Hi, honey! I'm pregnant again. I guess I'll just get another abortion, since "fetuses don't count as human life."
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, get as many abortions as you want!
ATHIEST MOM: Oh, and don't go in the bedroom.
ATHIEST DAD: Why not?
ATHIEST MOM: There are two *** men ****ing eachother in there.
ATHIEST DAD: Why are they here?
ATHIEST MOM: I wanted to watch them do it for awhile. They just aren't finished yet.
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, that's fine with me!

Suddenly, their neighbor runs into the house.

ATHIEST NEIGHBOR: Come quick, there's a Christian outside!
ATHIEST MOM: We'll be right there!

The athiest couple quickly put on a pair of black robes and hoods. They then exit the house, and run into the street, where a Christian is nailed to a large, wooden X. He is being burned alive. A crowd of athiests stand around him, all wearing black robes and hoods.

RANDOM ATHIEST: Damn you, Christian! We hate you! We claim to be tolerant of all religions. But we really hate your's! That's because we athiests are hypocritical like that! Die, Christian!

THE END

Scary, isn't it?"

"Seriously, does anybody ever cry at an Atheist's funeral?

I mean, since Atheists have no value whatsoever as human
beings (they're not even human, but only inhuman animals),
since Atheists are nothing but miserable Liars, Cowards
and Murderers, after all, why would anybody in their
right mind weep over the dead rotting corpse, or bone
chips and ashes (that get mixed together with those of
others from the crematory) of a worthless dead Atheist?

And what epitaph do you engrave on an Atheist's grave
marker? "Here lies the only good Atheist, which is a
dead Atheist". What else is there say? Nothing at all.
No last words, no last rites, no flowers, no anything.

Every time an Atheist dies, the world is better off as
a result of that dead Atheist being dead, & its damned
God-forsaken soul burning in the fiery pits of Hades. :)

Which begs another related question, do Atheists cry at
funerals? If so, why? Since Atheists hate God, and they
hate Family, and they hate Country, who are they crying
for? It is true: The only good Atheist is a dead Atheist."

D:

Atheist hate is totallty acceptable it would seem, but fire and brimstone upon anyone who criticises Christianity D:

*facepalm* too many idiots..........

[Toasty]

*sigh* I'm christian, but it doesn't mean I think like that. Athiests being evil lawbreakers is a stereotype. There was an Athiest on Glenn Beck a month or so ago, and he's a pretty decent guy. The only thing that a Christian should immediatley associate with an Athiest is that they don't believe in god. That's it.

I may not agree with Athiest beliefes, but don't associate me with these people. I have more common sense then that.

[Ironsight]

Glad my parents raised me without religion. Those people are a bunch of fanatical D*ckheads. Makes me ashamed to call myself a Christian.

[Laharl]

indeed it is the words of extremists, fundamentalism is a bigger hinderance to the progress of humanity than cancer

[Saturos S.]

Meh, I'm ok with opinion but it's extremists like this who just need to shut up. Believe what you believe, do what you like, just don't do it by hurting others (either physically or mentally.)

[Mallick]

athiests have no souls ! !!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Eugine]

Those quotes are classic! I lmao at most of them, the others were just plain weird >>

[Folcon]

what I find scary is, there was some bible thumper on campus yesterday that would like have agreed whole heartedly with everything in the Parent Post and that it was true of Atheists. Hell, he was saying everyone on campus were basically sinners and that we're all ****ed and going to hell unless we listen to what he says and stop all our "evil" things. Like smoking, looking at adult content, having sex while not married, and a bunch of other stuff.

I know I'm stereotyping here, but I think the guy must be Catholic. As far as I know, most other branches of Christianity are not as...vocal, about condemning others.

[Mathak Kraven]

These people claim atheist are ignorant while they are malinformed as well.

[Laharl]

"Masturbation can sometimes be wrong and it can sometimes not. If you masturbate thinking about how pretty the flowers are and how you want a puppy, essentially that's not wrong. But most times, that is not the case. I believe that when one masturbates a high percentage of the time they are fantasizing about a sexual partner therefore making masturbation lust. Lust, as the Bible states, is a sin. But masturbation is something that people in general should stay away from because it's hard not to lust whilst doing it."

GOLD XD

the quote that best sums up these idiots is this one

"

Quote

What kind of Christian would write off a person because they are athiest?

A Christian would do that. Because one day they will be going to hell, and he is going to write them off too."

And Escout needs to brush up on his reading skills, they're not called fundamentalists for ****s n giggles

[Drizzy Drake]

Christians callnig Atheists hypocrites?


HAHAHA. That is ****ing retarded. Cristians are SOOOO hypocritical. "We msut love everybdoy, no matter what their choices are"...."BEING *** IS BADDDDD".


Hmm, yup, that is so not hypocritical.

[Saturos S.]

Atheists can be pretty bad hypocrites as well though.

"OMG, YOU BELIEVE IN SOMETHING, OMG, THAT CAN'T EXIST, LOGIC, OMG"

3 bucks for the person who sees the irony note in the quote.

[Drizzy Drake]

I never sadi that Aietheists AREN'T hypocrites, but Christians call Atheists hypocrites, but they are hypocrites aswell.

[Saturos S.]

I wasn't implying that you did, I just wanted to point out that this works both ways.

*cough* irony note in my last post? *cough*

[Mathak Kraven]

Also don't you think it's funny how some fundamentalist christians hate science but then take use of the internet?

[Drizzy Drake]

And I know that they have to, but in catholic schools, one second you are learning abotu god creating the earth out of nothing, and then the next second you are learning about the big bang theory.

My friend once got kicked out of religion class for calling the school out for teaching both.

[Eugine]

As a person who went to a Catholic secondary school, what's wrong with that?

Catholic schools are private, so they have a right to teach that, or more accutately - not obligated to not teach creationism x.x.

Also, religious classes are thought by priests or nuns while science is thought by science teachers. In my school though, they allowed other 'pastors' from other denomination to teach us religious education cuz most weren't catholic, but a mixture of Christian denominations. I think if your friend hates it, go to another school or something.

And um, there are so many catholics including priests who believe in evolution and the big bang. We just believe God created/guided those processes x.x

Anyway, I dislike those 'fundamentalists' myself. They just aren't progressive.

[Laharl]

i went to a catholic primary and high school, and look how bitter and twisted i turned out XP

[Eugine]

REALLY??!?!
Maybe the priests did something to you x3

[Toasty]

DarkSword, on Jan 23 2008, 11:33 PM, said:

Glad my parents raised me without religion. Those people are a bunch of fanatical D*ckheads. Makes me ashamed to call myself a Christian.

Don't be ashamed to call yourself a Christian, be ashamed that they call themselves the same thing. What they're saying and doing is not what Christianity teaches.

escout, on Jan 24 2008, 05:58 AM, said:

what I find scary is, there was some bible thumper on campus yesterday that would like have agreed whole heartedly with everything in the Parent Post and that it was true of Atheists. Hell, he was saying everyone on campus were basically sinners and that we're all ****ed and going to hell unless we listen to what he says and stop all our "evil" things. Like smoking, looking at adult content, having sex while not married, and a bunch of other stuff.

I know I'm stereotyping here, but I think the guy must be Catholic. As far as I know, most other branches of Christianity are not as...vocal, about condemning others.

That last part is true. I don't see nearly as many Christians that Vocal as I do Catholics.

As for the "evil" things part, well, according to Christian teachings, all of those are evil. You're only supposed to have sex after being married, and looking at adult content (pr0n would be considered adultry) is like filling your head with bad images that do stay with you for your whole life. Smokeing is harmful to the body, and the Christian bible says that we are not to purpousfully damage ourselves in any way.

So according to Christianity, he's right. Also, acording to Christianity, all you have to do to get into heaven is believe in god, and believe that he died for your sins. If you haven't done that, then you're going to hell. But yelling out "You're all going to hell unless you repent!" isn't exactly an effective way of converting people to Christianity. >_o

Skidzorz, on Jan 24 2008, 12:26 PM, said:

Christians callnig Atheists hypocrites?

HAHAHA. That is ****ing retarded. Cristians are SOOOO hypocritical. "We msut love everybdoy, no matter what their choices are"...."BEING *** IS BADDDDD".

Hmm, yup, that is so not hypocritical.

Being *** is bad according to my religion, but not ALL christians hate everyone that the bible says is evil. I dislike ***s, and I'm against *** marrage (omg...sp?), but I don't HATE ***s. I also don't hate Athiests. I only hate their religion.


But, overall, even though the majority of Americans claim to be christian, there aren't many who are TRUE Christians. The people who made those quotes are not true christians.

[Folcon]

I know I'm not. Hell, I'm not affiliated with any religion. I just roll with what I feel is right by my ideals. But thats for the religion topic, sooo, yeah.

[Eugine]

Christianity is all about, "What will Jesus do?". Jesus, from the countless reading of him, wouldn't have had the same views as any of the posts there, so imo, they do not behave Christ like, and therefore are not Christian like.

[Ironsight]

I don't like ***s, but stoning them (even if its fake) is way over the line. Same thing with Aethiests (sp).

[Eugine]

You know. We Christians campaign so much on homosexuality, when Jesus in his entire life didn't criticise homosexuality in anyway.

[Saturos S.]

I went to a primary school where we had R.E. (Religious Education) the only education we talked about was christianity and they didn't really force it upon you. They didn't deny it or approve, they just told the story as it is.

[Moonear]

laharl the slayer, on Jan 24 2008, 01:33 AM, said:

And what epitaph do you engrave on an Atheist's grave
marker? "Here lies the only good Atheist, which is a
dead Atheist". What else is there say? Nothing at all.

ROFLWAFFLES!
This stuff is gold, I can't help but to laugh at it. These people just take everything too seriously.

[Caael]

.eugine, on Jan 25 2008, 11:43 AM, said:

You know. We Christians campaign so much on homosexuality, when Jesus in his entire life didn't criticise homosexuality in anyway.

He probably was ***. Why do you think he hung around with dudes all the time?

[Drizzy Drake]

He totally tapped Mary Megdaline(sp?).

[Arkarian]

I didn't realise Atheism was a religion, I thought it was a lack of one...Anywho, nasty outlook on life if all you see is bad people everywhere, it's enough to drive you maaad :b. In my first year of Uni I went to a pub quiz but before the quiz began we got lectured by the head of the christianity society (a good one is the 'coc soc', short for ****tail society, lol), it was about the usual; "how everyone was going to hell (including him) and that there was nothing you could do to stop this, but, you could try and do something that may make God think your worth something (like join the christian society), in all likelyhood it wouldn't help...but do it anyway." Very inspiring :P. Another person I was talking to; I told them about how the Olympic gods were a bit off there heads and that Britain didn't have gods like that. To my mind meaning that most of the old bretonic/gaelic etc gods aren't that human like. They answered that it was because Britain followed the path of the one true God, and wouldn't believe me when I said that christianity was introduced by the romans between 200-400A.D. as they put it "The Romans where christian? But the Romans killed Jesus." XD

[Drizzy Drake]

The Romans killed Jesus because they didn't beleive he was the true son of god. They thought he was soem crazy lunatic.

[Saturos S.]

They killed him because they were scared of his increasing popularity. That and they had their own gods, though a lot of religions were allowed by the romans, the popularity christianity had and the fact they called Jesus a king pissed Augustus off. He more or less said: "Yeah, ok, Pontius Pilatus, you can go ahead and kill him."

They were scared of him, not because they didn't believe he was a son of god.

[Drizzy Drake]

Well didn't the Jews kill Jesus, and THEY didn't beleive he was the son of God. And didn't the Pontius dude jsut like wash his hands of trhe situation?

[Saturos S.]

... the romans killed jesus, the jews were more or less Jesus' followers. :P

[Drizzy Drake]

Um, no. The jews thought that Jesus wasn't the son of god. I don't effing know. I haven't been to church since I was 10, was really stoned when I watched Passion so I don't remember much from that movie, and I'm jsut going by that South Park episode.

[Saturos S.]

They don't think he's the messiah. They didn't want him killed though. Note the different in Jews (people) and Jews (faith). A lot of his followers were Jews (people) and (faith). Christians and Jews (faith) just disagree on the subject if Jesus was the messiah or not. I don't think they ever wanted him dead, maybe a few rich Jews (people) with roman political interests but it would be unlikely if anyone ever wrote that down.

[Drizzy Drake]

They might not ahve wanted him dead, but they didn't beleive he was the son of god. Ya, that makes sense. Still, that Pontius guy washed his hands of the killing issue.

[Saturos S.]

Pontius Pilatus gave the order yep, then Jesus went to die for the sins of mankind.

The Jews don't recognise him as the messiah, I'm not sure it they don't believe he's the son of god, they at least mention him in their holy book(s).

[Drizzy Drake]

I mean didn't the Pontius guy kind of say he didn't want any part of it, and let the peopel decide, or was that somebody else?

[Saturos S.]

That was somebody else. Pontius Pilatus was the governor of Judea. He gave the order after council if Emperor Augustus to find and kill him.

[Drizzy Drake]

Ok. SO does anybdoy knwo the name of the washed-hands-of-Jesus guy?

[Saturos S.]

Jesus washed the feet of his disiples before he was betrayed at the last supper if that's what you mean.

[Drizzy Drake]

No, there was the one guy who was supossed to make the descision to kill or to not kill Jesus. He really didn't want Jesus dead, but didn't want to disagree with the people, so he washed his hands of the situation(which means basically he decided to not be part of it).

[Mallick]

Skidzorz, on Jan 24 2008, 12:26 PM, said:

Christians callnig Atheists hypocrites?


HAHAHA. That is ****ing retarded. Cristians are SOOOO hypocritical. "We msut love everybdoy, no matter what their choices are"...."BEING *** IS BADDDDD".


Hmm, yup, that is so not hypocritical.

let's not generalize christianity the way some christians generalize (and exaggerate, lie, etc. etc.) athiests.

[Laharl]

The Romans were incredibly tolerant when it came to religion, often assimilating the gods of the places they conquered into their own religion. Christians would not accept this, believing only their 'true' god, blaspheming countless times in the process, and thus they were persecuted. Constantine is responsible for holding back the development of humanity for 1200 years, the twat.

Christianity is no more believable than the patheonic gods, and atleast they had awesome going for them

[Toasty]

Arkarian, on Jan 27 2008, 04:19 AM, said:

I didn't realise Atheism was a religion, I thought it was a lack of one...Anywho, nasty outlook on life if all you see is bad people everywhere, it's enough to drive you maaad :b. In my first year of Uni I went to a pub quiz but before the quiz began we got lectured by the head of the christianity society (a good one is the 'coc soc', short for ****tail society, lol), it was about the usual; "how everyone was going to hell (including him) and that there was nothing you could do to stop this, but, you could try and do something that may make God think your worth something (like join the christian society), in all likelyhood it wouldn't help...but do it anyway." Very inspiring :wacko: . Another person I was talking to; I told them about how the Olympic gods were a bit off there heads and that Britain didn't have gods like that. To my mind meaning that most of the old bretonic/gaelic etc gods aren't that human like. They answered that it was because Britain followed the path of the one true God, and wouldn't believe me when I said that christianity was introduced by the romans between 200-400A.D. as they put it "The Romans where christian? But the Romans killed Jesus." XD

If the head of the Christianity society said that, then he's not a christian. Christianity says that anyone can be saved. All you need to get into heaven is to let christ into your heart.

[Drizzy Drake]

I don't see the point in donig things in life, just so that somebdoy who may, or may not, exist, can judge you when you die. I say, live your life how YOU want it, and if God even exists, he can judge you for who you are, not who some dude in a big white hat says you should be(the pope).

[Mathak Kraven]

Those fundamentalist forgot about the more evil satanistic plans of Atheists where we plan to nuke the hell out of Heaven to prove God is dead. What a wonderful plan that is, it's like George Bush himself made it up.

Dude of Wind, on Jan 28 2008, 11:26 AM, said:

If the head of the Christianity society said that, then he's not a christian. Christianity says that anyone can be saved. All you need to get into heaven is to let christ into your heart.

A person? In my heart? That must hurt alot. Like I don't have a big enough heart.

[Drizzy Drake]

How can Aeitheists bomb Heaven if they don't beleive in Heaven?

I'm so confused. Or was that sarcasm?