[Toasty]

XD! You get the point. More toasters? Not likely. More pancakes? Probably.

[FlamingDuck]

Ever notice how chapter titles have no connection to the actual chapter?

Chapter 17: Like a Slowly Dying Beast of Woe, Who Realizes his Mistake Just as it is too Late…

After what seemed to be days of walking, the adepts finally decided to take a break. Isaac and Mia wandered off to a suitably dark part of the long, well-lit corridor, and found a hot tub.
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THERE WITH HER!!?!?!?!?!!!” Jenna screeched.
“Oh, Mia’s gay too. It’s a gay thing.” Isaac responded calmly as he slipped into the tub.
Felix gave them exactly tfive minutes before he pulled them out of it.
“Awwwww, you’re no fun, Felix…” Isaac whined.
“Quiet, soldier! You will speak when spoken to! Now, I have some important lessons for you, F-unit. One, if you get caught in a fight, go down in a blaze of glory. That’ll give me more time to get away. Secondly--” Felix said when he was suddenly interrupted by Ivan being thrown through the wall by Sheba.
“…and that will teach you to try and take my Guivinnelle!” Sheba said.
“What’s through that wall?” Felix asked.
“Oh, nothing really. Just an infinite void. Someone probably divided by zero when they were building this part of the house.”
"Ah." Felix said
The adepts continued on, sans Ivan, until they discovered a suspicious looking patch of wall.
“Aha! This is probably the exit, but Ivan #2 never expected us to find it, but we’ll find it, and that’ll show him!” Isaac said.
“Isaac, you’re acting weird again.” Piers said.
“What makes you think that this is the exit, anyway?” Felix asked.
“I dunno..its just an instinct. Maybe I’m getting in touch with my element? Only one way to find out!” Isaac exclaimed as he threw his shoe through the wall and watched it disappear into the void. “Crap,” he said.
“See if we ever trust you again…” Felix muttered.
Finally, the group reached a door.
“I’m thinking this is the exit.” Garet said.
“You know, I'm thinking you’re right.” Felix said.
“I hate you all!” Isaac said.
“Go!” Felix shouted.
Six bodies careened through the door, and Felix gingerly stepped through it once he was sure the others weren’t dead or permanantly damaged. They stared around, and, to their surprise, were stared back at.
“And what might you be doing here?” asked Ivan, who was wearing Isaac’s shoe. He had paused his slideshow in order examine to the intruders.
The adepts had stumbled into accidentally attended the IHOP manager training seminar.
“They put what in those pancakes?” Piers asked incredulously, satring at the slide.
“That’s why they’re so cheap!” Isaac said disgustedly.
Garet was too busy throwing up his breakfast to say anything.
“Enough is enough! We must not let the people be fooled any longer! We must inform them of what goes on in an IHOP restaurant!” Felix exclaimed.
The adepts hastily agreed, a turned for the exit. Suddenly, Ivan was standing there.
“Woah! Ivan! Didn’t notice you there! Err…Why are you wearing Isaac’s boot?” Piers asked.
“You must stay here. You have seen too much. You may not leave, unless you feel prepared to manage our new Siberian chain of IHOPs, also known as ZHTZ in Russian.” Ivan said blandly.
“Never! We couldn’t possibly do what you do! It would disgrace our families! It would disgrace our shoes! NOOOO! Come back to me shoe! I can make you clean again!” Isaac cried.
“Ummm, excuse Isaac. The loss of his, um, you know, has rendered him a little wonky.” Felix said.
“Now, will you join us? Or will we have to destroy you?”

[Platinum Sun]

FlamingDuck, on Mar 9 2007, 05:59 PM, said:

If you get caught in a fight, go down in a blaze of glory. That’ll give me more time to get away.

^The only genuinely funny thing that happened. Worth it!

[Toasty]

How come everyone only finds one or two things funny in each chapter? We must be slipping.

I can tell how the Jenna getting mad at Mia thing is getting old now. Seriously, it's getting pretty bad. So less of that, and more other stuff! Ivan being thrown through the wall was a very nice touch though FD. :P

I'll just assume that it's Ivan in the seminar and not Ivan #2.

Chapter 18: The IHOP Conspiracy!

The group stood there staring at Ivan blankly, as if they expected him to know the answer.

"How much will we get pai--" Garet was stopped short by Jenna, who smacked him across the head.

"We won't take the job no matter how much you pay us!" Jenna yelled at Ivan.

"What if I told you Mia will be forced to do garbage duty?" Ivan said with a more humane tone.

"....so how much did you say this paid?" Jenna asked in a more curious tone.

"Be quiet! We're not giving in to his demands! Everyone glare at him 'till he goes away!" Felix began glareing at Ivan with the most hideous face anyone had ever seen. At the sight of such a disturbing face, Ivan curled up into a ball and rolled back to the stage. "That'll teach you to mess with me!.....hey, I can't get my face unstuck! I'm dommed to look like this forever!" Said a panicking Felix.

" I told you his face would get stuck like that!" Sheba whispered to Piers.

"Fine fine.....here's your cash...."Piers whispered back as he handed a grinning Sheba a roll 'o green-backs.

"Quite worrying Felix. Just put some meat tenderizer or something on it." Mia said as she stared at the stage. "Oh...Emm...Eff...Gee.....They're filling the pancakes with...with...with......with genetically altered tofu!" Mia screamed in horror as she fainted. Isaac Ran to catch her, but Jenna stuck out her foot and tripped him. Mia fell hard on Isaac's back just as he hit the floor.

"Dangit! I almost had 'em that time!" Jenna said under her breath.

Garet turned around and spit out the free samples he had in his mouth. "What is wrong with these people?! They're sick and twisted!" Garet yelled once he had recovered himself.

"What else is new?" Felix said sarcasticly.

"Don't use that tone with me young man!" Garet scolded Felix.

"Young?! I'm a whole year older than you!" Felix yelled back.

"I wonder how long this will last." Piers whispered to Sheba.

"Wanna bet on it?" She whispered back as she grinned and counted her winnings. Piers just rolled his eyes.

Meanwhile, Felix and Garet continued to quarrel about their superiority, the seminar continued.

"Everyone turn your pamphlets to page 412. Here we see the proper way to sell out pancakes. Remember everyone, "POOP" is your friend." Ivan said as he demonstarted "POOP" to the crowd of people at the seminar.

"....the hell? Did he just say 'poop is your friend'?" Said a perplexed Felix, who had stopped fighting with Garet just moments ago.

"These people are messed up!" Garet yelled.

"Shhh! Quite acting retarded and pay attnetion for a minute! He's explaining something!" The adepts payed attention just long enough to catch Ivan's last few words before he stepped off the stage.

"Remember, People Order Our Pancakes. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some urgent buisness matters to attned to." Ivan said to the audience as he left the stage. The head honcho of the event was audible in the backround as he continued with the next speaker.

Ivan walked up a side isle to where the adepts were. "Well, I'm surprised you're still here. I thought you would've been smart enough to leave already." He said in his monotonus tone.

"We're not afraid of you! We'll stay and fight you if that's what it takes!" Isaac yelled at Ivan as he lay on the floor under a still fainted Mia.

"How could you possibly fight me? You're stuck under a hot fainted chick, and you can't even see me from where you are!" He retorted.

"He's right Isac, you are pretty dumb." Garet commented.

"Look who's talking, mister five word vocabuary!" Isaac yelled back.

"I know more than five words!"Garet said shyly

"Alright, you know six words." Said Isaac.

"Quit fighting! It's not getting you anywhere!" Jenna yelled at the two.

"Yeah, but it's getting me rich!" Sheba said under her breath as she counted the money she won from Piers.

"So my offer still stands. Either take control of IHOP Siberia, or I'm afraid we'll have to......ask you to leave!" Ivan said in a frightening tone.

"Wait a minute....that doesn't make any sense!" Garet said.

"Garet, nothing makes sense to you." Isaac said in a sarcastic tone.

"Well does it make sense to you?" Garet questioned Isaac.

"......no......." Isaac said softly.

"So what, first you say you'll destroy us, and now you're going to let us go?"

"Of course not! I just like messing with people's heads! Now where were we?...Oh yes. Join us or die!" Said Ivan just as the chapter ended.

----------

So there's chapter 18. Hopefully it's better than what we've been dishing out lately.

[FlamingDuck]

Decentish. I might post a new chapter today. Or tomorrow. Or never. Actually, Duck is offering Chapter 18.5 up for grabs, to save this slowly dying beast of woe, who realizes his mistake just as it is too late…

EDIT: Please! Someone! Take up the chapter!

[FlamingDuck]

Woot, double post! And I'm allowed to do it, too!

Chapter 19:

WARNING! This chapter may or may not contain a description of food. Please, eat a hearty meal before reading this. Or don’t. Perhaps it’s all in your head. Scary thought, eh? Well, how are you? Oh wait, yeah, the chapter.

Five minutes later, the adepts found themselves on a flying ship bound for Siberia.
“This is your captain speaking. Because Siberia is in a different dimension, we will be flying at right angles to reality for a short time. During this ride, you will probably want to fasten your fourth dimension seat belt, which is just to your right and fifteen minutes ahead of you.”
After trying to find the belts for a few minutes, the adepts gave up.
“How the heck did we get here, anyway?” Sheba asked.
Nobody answered, because they were all staring at Garet and his pet rabbit.
“Where did you get a rabbit?” Felix asked.
“Oh, I found it.” Garet said, stroking the rabbit contentedly.
“What? We walked down a steel hallway and into this flying ship thing! Where did you find time to get a rabbit?” Felix asked.
“Oh…I have my ways.” Garet said, “Look! Another one!”
Everyone followed Garet’s finger to see a rather surprised floating rabbit. It disappeared just as Garet leaped for it, causing him to hit his head on an inconveniently located mast. He sank to the ground groaning.
“Attention. We are preparing to transcend dimensions. If you don’t have your 4D seat belt on yet, sucks to be you. You’ll probably end up somewhere completely different from where you want to be. Like a mosh pit. We will launch in 5…4…3…2…1…Okay I lied. We will launch in 5…4…”
Suddenly, the ship lurched and the adepts found themselves floating in a gooey substance vaguely reminiscent of ink diluted with sulfuric acid.
“Woah cool! I can see the back of my neck! And all the skin that’s peeling off it! Ach that hurts! Ooohh! Stop!” Piers said.
The rest of the group turned to see what was happening, but when their brains started a self-destruct countdown, they decided to look at something safer, like the sun.
A few seconds later, they reappeared on a tropical island. Miraculously, Garet still had his rabbit. Felix did a quick check to make sure that they were all there. He was quite puzzled to find that he was counting in base three now. His brain did somersaults for a bit, and then he decided just to forget it.
“Check it out! This universe has four moons!” Jenna said.
“Ahh! How do you count to four in this retarded place?!?!?” Felix asked exasperatedly.
No one paid attention to him because they were all staring at the moons.
“Check it out! That one’s purple!” Mia said.
“I hate you all…” Felix said.
“So…how do we get off this thing?” Isaac asked.
“Ehh…walk?” Sheba guessed.
“Which way?” Isaac asked.
“Ehhmmm…Probably the way that big red sign is pointing.” Sheba said.
“Good idea.”
The group set off in the direction of a large floating red arrow.
“Woah, check it out!” Garet said from somewhere, “I can fly!!”
Felix tried to launch be flapping his arms and jumping, but he only made himself look rather silly.
“Aww, I guess Felix is too fat.” Garet said from inside a nearby cloud.
“What, Garet? You weigh like 70 pounds more than me!” Felix replied angrily.
“Yeah, but it’s all muscle! You’re just fat!” Garet called.
“Graah!” Felix growled and punched a tree. To his annoyance, the tree rose up into the air. Suddenly, he had an idea.
“Mia, punch me!” he yelled.
“With pleasure.” Mia said with an evil glint in her eye. Before Felix could rethink his decision, Mia wound up and dropped him to the grass.
“…Ow…” Felix said.
The group walked a bit farther but then they ran into an invisible wall.
“Eesh…There’s been a lot of strange stuff going on lately…We need to sneak into the universe control center and see what’s really going on!” Felix said.
“Yeah, like Solid Snake!” Jenna said.
Suddenly, Isaac overflowed with life. “Ahh, yes! Purpose in life! It feels good to be sitting right here on this godforsaken rock, with the cool breeze on my back, and a good meal in my belly! Ah, yes, the luscious greens of my salad with extra-virgin olive oil, the chicken alfredo, glistening with the rich, creamy sauce, and meat raviolis, and--”
“Isaac?” Jenna said.
“Yeah?”
“Shut up.”
“So, where will we find this ‘control center’ anyway?” Piers asked.
“I dunno. Wherever our hearts lead us. If you--” Isaac was cut off because he had walked into a sign that said “Mnopfluik Control Center.”
“Heh, that was easy.” Felix said.

[Sea of Time]

That chapter kind of dragged near the end, but the beginning was worth an XD

[FlamingDuck]

Yeah, I got bored. Normally I get annoyed about 3/4 of a page down. So then I just make up random crap to push it to a page and a half.

[Platinum Sun]

*Empties dustpan into temporal vortex*

Yeah, those parallel universes are enlessly versatile.

*vanishes back into the dimension of convenient plot devices*

[Alex the Adept]

This is funnier than a Kareoke bar! XDXDXDXD
*Goes back to Weyard to cook some Poseiden butt*

[Aquamarine]

So er... What's up with this? Come on people, I want to see more funnies!

[FlamingDuck]

Mr. T is a slowpoke. But seriously. Mr. T, I give you another week before I hijack it.

[Toasty]

Don't worry. I just had a bad run in with life and writers block at the same time. Bad mix when it comes to writing. :D I just hope this one is loads funnier than the last, because I feel our viewers are displeased.

[Aquamarine]

We're not displeased! We're just a little... disgruntled. Is that the right word?

[Sea of Time]

Aquamarine, on Mar 22 2007, 01:35 PM, said:

We're not displeased! We're just a little... disgruntled. Is that the right word?

We?

I'm not disgruntled, I'm patient. So hurry up!

[Ironsight]

....um....okayyy....well, im bored now, hurry up will you?

[Toasty]

A'ight a'ight. No need to get your pants in a knot, because here it is!



Chapter 20: Germany, in the Fourth Dimension!

As the adepts stared at the oddly placed sign, most of them began to wonder where exactly the control center was. Except for Garet, who was still hiding in a cloud overhead, bombarding Felix with coconuts.

"Ow! Hey!......where'd that come from?!" Felix looked around, and couldn't find a single tree overhead. Just then, a flaming coconut came hurling out of a cloud straight for Felix's forehead. It hit him square in the face, knocking him off his feet, and sending him a good ten feet backwards.

"HAHAHAHA! Oh man! You should have seen the way you flipped backwards!" Isaac said with tears in his eyes, as he pointed at Felix and laughed until his lungs collapsed.

"Hey! You're no better off! You ran into a freaking sign!" Felix said as he got up and brushed himself off.

"Garet! Felix! Get back over here! We have to find the control center!" Yelled Jenna.

"Oh I already found it. It's floating in that oddly shaped cloud over there." Garet said from his not-so-secret hiding spot.

"Well how in the world are we supposed to get to it?" Isaac said as he stared at the cloud. The rest of the adepts were already on there way along a conveniently placed path in a nearby rain forest, with Garet in the lead.

"Hey! Wait up!…and quit doing that!" Isaac ran to catch up to the rest of the group. "Why didn't you guys tell me you were leaving?"

"We did. You were just too busy staring at the sky. So in case you were to zoned out to hear, Garet said he spotted a freakishly tall ladder. So we're following him." Jenna replied.

"Hey, I wasn't zoned out, I was just.....concentrating! Yeah, that's it!"

"Sure. You tell yourself that."

"Hey look! There's a weird rubber ladder over there!" Piers pointed off in the direction of a ladder that reached into the clouds.

"How are we supposed to climb a rubber ladder?" Asked Garet.

"I don't know, maybe like a regular ladder?" Retorted Sheba.

"But it's not a regular ladder…." Said a confused Garet.

"Did you forget we're in a parallel universe? For all we know, that could be as normal as it gets!" Sheba replied.

"Well let's get going already! We don't have all day you know!" Yelled Jenna from behind the group. Worried that Jenna might unleash an unholy barrage of pain on them, the group quickly, and quite clumsily, began to climb the ladder.

"I told you this wouldn't be easy!" Garet yelled at Sheba a few minutes later.

"Shut up! You can fly so don't be complaining!" She replied angrily.

The adepts continued their slow ascent up the wobbly ladder, until they had finally reached the top, which appeared to be inside a huge complex filled with control panels, monitors, and a man in a pancake costume.

"Jeez! I don't ever want to see a ladder again.…" Isaac said as he bent over to catch his breath. Garet just stood there as happy as a clam.

"*pant* So where *pant* is everybody? *pant* " Asked an exhausted Jenna.

Sheba pointed to a sign that read "Having lunch, back in 5 minutes!"

"Alright then, what do we do now?" Isaac asked.

"I thought you were the leader." Said Felix sarcastically.

"You…you shut your mouth!" Isaac replied in a hurt tone.

"I'm hungry." Said Garet.

"What else is new." Sheba said

Just then, the floor began to shake. Off in the distance of the huge complex, the adepts could see a huge stampede of people rushing towards them.

"Ahh! Runaway mob!" Garet flew away to hide in one of the rafters, a good 50 feet over head.

"Garet! Get down here! It's just the employees!" Jenna yelled up towards the ceiling.

Just then, one of the employees who had heard the yelling ran in the group's direction.

"Is everything alright?" He asked.

"Well, a numbskull flew up into your rafters. We yelled at it to see if it might fall down, but he's stuck up there good. You might want to call pest control." Jenna replied.

"Hey! I'm not a whatever you called me!" Garet yelled as he flew down from the rafters.

"See what I mean?" She asked the man.

"Yeah…. so what are you people doing here? And what's with the outfits?"

"Hey! I'm in style!" Retorted Piers.

"Dude, you've got a freaking sailor outfit on. You're about as in style as the Backstreet Boys." Felix said as he hit Piers across the head.

"Ow!"

"Don't tell me that actually hurt…. wimp."

Jenna whirled around and yelled at the two. "Be quiet! I'm talking here!"

"Yes ma'am…." They said simultaneously.

"Hey Mia, you haven't talked in a while. What's up?" He asked, but received no reply. "….Mia? Helooooo, I'm talking to you."

"Isaac, you're talking to an inflated balloon, with a smiley face drawn on it." Said Sheba as she pointed out the obvious.

"….MIA?! Where are you! Don't leave me here all aloooone!" He yelled.

Off in the distance, Mia was flirting with one of the employees at his workstation. "Hey…Does that guy know you?" asked the employee.

"No, I've never seen him before." She replied. "You wanna play the nervous game?" She asked in a seductive tone.

"Uhh…umm…. I'm on duty right now so…"

"Ugh! You're so dimwitted!" She got up and stomped off towards the group.

"Mia! Where have you been? My life was falling apart without you!" Isaac said as he knelt before her.

"Oh go suck a lemon! Your so pathetic!"

"ISAAC!!! Jenna yelled at his words. She jumped into the air, tore off a rafter, and brought it down hard on his head."

"Whoa! Hey! Hold up! We need that thing!…. or something." Yelled the employee who Jenna was just talking to.

"Fine. I don't need it anymore anyway." She tossed the huge piece of steel in his direction. It landed with a loud thud right next to him.

Isaac just lay unconscious there with a huge bump growing out of his head.

"…Since when did Isaac get a second head?" Asked a clueless Garet.

"You're hopeless." Said Sheba as she shook her head.

"Like I haven't heard that before."

"Yeah, too bad it's a fact, huh?"

"I hate you…." He glared.

"So yeah. Gonna have to ask y'all to move on outa here. We've got a nice gift shop though, you should stop by on your way out." Said the employee.

"Where? We came up on that ladder, and he didn't see any gift shop!" Piers said.

"Ohh… So that's how you got in. I'm gonna have to fire that janitor someday. There's an elevator in the lobby. Leads straight down into the city."

"GARET!" Jenna yelled.

"No! Don't hurt me!" He flew back up into the rafters.

"Dude, she just peeled one of those right off the ceiling like a banana. I don't think your going to be all that safe up there." Felix said to him.

"Guards!" The employee yelled. Two men in uniform rushed over, and put their right arms in the air, with the hands bent down. "Please escort these young people to the lobby."

"Heheh. *** Nazis...." Chuckled Piers under his breath.

"Alright, might as well get going then. You can stay here with Isaac." Jenna said to Garet as she turned around and headed for the lobby. The rest of the adepts followed closely behind, leaving Garet in the rafters, and Isaac unconscious, stuck a foot or two deep into the floor.



--------------------------

[generic indication of ending here]



I'm guessing this is the longest one yet. I hope it's better than the last few.

[Ironsight]

Man, how is Isaac gonna be in GS3 if he's off getting his head fixed all the time?

[Toasty]

Yeah, haven't done that in a while. It just seemed fitting at the time. You know? Though others may say otherwise.

[Ironsight]

no, no, dont get me wrong. i have no complaints as long as Isaac actualy lives through the story (or at least able to walk). one thing you realy need to bring back is the toast thing. that part always killed me.

[Alex the Adept]

Make more chapters! I like this fic! :P

[Aquamarine]

I agree with Alex! I like this fic tooooo! :P

[FlamingDuck]

Ehhh, unless I get a massive spurt of inspiration by tonight, the next chapter will be up sometime next week. I'm just not feeling it...:P

[Aquamarine]

Um... Hello? *voice echoes a dozen times* Guess nobody is here.

[Sea of Time]

I don't want to say your chapters have lost quality the last dozen, but I'll seriously consider stop reading this unless FD comes up with a killer chapter 21.

[Toasty]

Yeah. I can kinda see our chapters slowly losing origionality and funnyness. It's kinda hard to keep coming up with new and funny material, you know? It'd be a lot easier if it was a serious fanfic. At least then you don't have to come up with something entirely new each time. It's like every chapter is it's own story.

[Platinum Sun]

I'll be the first to admit that he's right. I can make comedy work because I can work it into a coherant storyline that's completely seperate. All-comedy-all-the-time is like trying to build a snow fort out of sno-cones. It sounds fun, but the logistics wear you down quickly. My solution is to suggest that everyone lay off our esteemed authors (I can't believe that I said it with a straight face either) for awhile. There hasn't been a significant amount of whining and begging me for new chapters, and I think that's why I've been able to continue to have fun and turn out quality work.

[Ironsight]

i havent whined since my last post here, witch was last week i think. however, i thnk PS is right. we gotta give FD and Mr. T here a little room to breath.

[Aquamarine]

Platinum Sun, on Apr 6 2007, 03:25 AM, said:

I'll be the first to admit that he's right. I can make comedy work because I can work it into a coherant storyline that's completely seperate. All-comedy-all-the-time is like trying to build a snow fort out of sno-cones. It sounds fun, but the logistics wear you down quickly. My solution is to suggest that everyone lay off our esteemed authors (I can't believe that I said it with a straight face either) for awhile. There hasn't been a significant amount of whining and begging me for new chapters, and I think that's why I've been able to continue to have fun and turn out quality work.

Screw that! I WANT MORE CHAPTERS!! ;)

[Toasty]

*slaps* You wait your turn!.....Besides, if you want it that badly, take it up with FD. He's the man with chapter 23.

[FlamingDuck]

Errmmm...it might be up tomorrow. But I just got Twilight Princess...so maybe not.

[Toasty]

GAH! Curse thee, owners of Wii's! I SHALL HAVE MAH REVENGETH! *cries*

[Ironsight]

MAY UNHOLY DISMEMBERMENT BEFALL UNTO ALL YE WII OWNERS

[Toasty]

Lets see....1,2,3....this thing has been sitting here for 12 days, and FD still hasn't written a chapter.

[Split Infinity]

If he's writing chapters, wtf are you doing?

[EDIT] Ah, so you're alternating.

[FlamingDuck]

Due to my slight lack of laziness, I have finished a chapter. Perhaps you will enjoy it. Perhps you won't. I have pie?

Chapter 21: MUSKRAT INVASION!

The adepts were marched down a hallway and into an elevator. Or, actually, an elevator shaft.
“Well, this sucks.” Felix said over the whistling of the air.
“How do we get out of this?” Jenna asked.
“I have an idea! HOVER!” Sheba yelled. A pulsating rainbow light spread under her feet, and then disappeared. “Dangit, I forgot. There isn’t a conveniently located hover pad here. Crap.”
“Woah…that reminded me of that time Piers gave me some LSD…” Garet said dreamily.
“Eh heh…He must mean, er, Light Strobing Devices. Yeah.” Piers said.
And so the adepts fell down, down, down, down…And then they crashed through the bottom of the shaft.
“Some gift shop…” Isaac said.
“Is everyone okay?” Mia asked.
“Yeah, we landed on a…ROCK LOBSTER!” Piers yelled.
“ROCK LOBSTER!” everyone else yelled.
*insert guitar solo*
“Thank you, thank you everybody. That was a great show. Thanks for comin’ on out to see us tonight, we’ll be selling merchandise in the lobby. Goodnight…Wait, where the hell are we? Whatever! Goodnight and ROCK ON!” Felix shouted to the group of rats that had assembled to watch the performance.
“Look, Ivan! This place has free Wi-fi!” Sheba said excitedly.
“Yeah, I noticed. Don’t bother me, I’ve almost hacked into main operating system…Oh no, the firewall detected me! Quick, I gotta patch my kernel and re-update my drivers…” Ivan mumbled.
“You know, I don’t think Ivan has a clue what he’s talking about.” Felix said.

~~~~

Elsewhere

“Look boss, I’m sorry, but there was just no way to keep the muskrats down any longer. We had to do what we did.”
“That’s still no excuse why my soup was cold last night!”
“Oh, that’s what you called me here for?”
“Yes. What about those muskrats?”
“They were, uh, revolting. They got Bob, Jim, and Kushinada.”
“That last one…He doesn’t sound local. Where’s he from?”
“Err…he mumbled something about ‘I’m a sumo’, but I just blamed that on jet lag.”
“Right. Destroy all evidence, and send the generic apology to the families. You know the deal.”
“Yes sir.”

~~~

“I has an idea!” Garet said after a couple of minutes of head banging. The adepts were sitting in the basement, wondering how to get out. The elevator was sitting in a steaming heap 20 yards off.
“What is it?” Felix asked.
“Let’s go save the world!” Garet said.
“Again?” Isaac asked.
“Ach, I bequeath thee young knave, don’st ques’n the wit of thy favored companion!” Sheba said.
“Dangit, stop reading Shakespeare! Anyway, that line was nowhere near iambic pentameter! It should have read:
‘Ach, you toad, I bequeath thee, young knave, don’st
Ques’n the wit of thy favored companion, lout!’
methinks!” Isaac said.
“NERD FIGHT!” Piers shouted.
“What? Where? I want in!” Ivan shouted.
“Anyway, back to the saving the world idea…” Garet said.
“Garet, we need something to save the world from!” Jenna said.
“I know! Let’s get someone to save the world from us!” Garet shouted.
“Now, that’s not a half bad idea…” Felix said.

~~~

*reeeeeeeeeeeooooooooooooooommmmmmmmm…*
“Hey, what?”

^ That little part will be very important later on, just to let you know…

~~~

Felix and co. stormed out of the basement into the warm night air.
“Screw this joint, let’s bounce.” he said.
A flash of light later, the eight adepts were back in Wayward, with destruction on their minds.

[Platinum Sun]

This delay was beginning to worry me a little. Now that it's back, it worries me a lot.

[Ironsight]

ROCK LOBSTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Aquamarine]

Pretty good chapter. But not good enough to compensate for the very long wait! ;)

[Toasty]

Why worry about delay when you can worry about.....crap. No witty remark....

CHAPTER 22: !!!

"Soooooo.....what do we do now?" Garet asked.

"...what? This was your idea!" Jenna yelled.

"Your point?"

"Grrrr....."

A few slaps later, the group had come up with an idea.

"Hey, what ever happened to Alex?" Isaac asked.

"Yeah, or that one IHOP manager?" Peirs questioned

"What about....YOUR MOM?" Garet said.

"What about my foot up your ass?" Jenna said angrily. [/subtle "That 80's Show" remark]

"Whatever happened to my conveniently placed plot twist?" Asked some guy in the audience.

Someone told him to shut up, and most other's threw popcorn.

"Now seriously." Jenna said.

"....seriously what?" Isaac asked.

"Huh?" Jenna replied.

"Well?" Isaac pestered.

"What?" She asked.

"Quit confusing me!!" Isaac yelled as he grabed his head and fell over.

"*sigh*......So what are we going to do? Should we burn Vault to the groun first, or take out that annoying little smurf village full of miners?" Jenna said.

"What smurf village?" Piers asked

"You know, where we got that kickass kalaeidoscope?" Garet explained.

"Garet, it was a cannon. Not a kalaeidoscope." Felix retorted

"Does he even know what that is?" Ivan asked.

"I highly doubt it." Felix replied.

A few awkward moments of silence later, Garet piped up with what could turn out to be a plan worth listening to....

"I say we eat some pancakes!"

....or not.

~~~

Meanwhile, the conviniently placed "little part that will be very important later on" is continued.

"Seriously. What was that?"

"What was what?"

"Nevermind."

(purpously left open for interpretation and possible continuance)

~~~

The group decided that smurfs we're not safe for humanity [/subtle VG Cats refrence], and struted off to Loho. On their way there, they saw a kitty. The kitty saw a dog and ate it. The dog burst out of the kitty He-Man style and took off. Garet followed pursuit, but was quickly stopped with a yank to the collar, and was promptly hit on the nose with a newspaper.

End of short story #1.

A few miles further down the road, they spotted a conviniently placed IHOP.

The group had foreseen this ugly scenario, and had spiked a glass of warm milk that they gave to Garet to "make up" for hitting him on the nose.

"Good thing Sheba has the whole 'I can see the future! look at me! blahblahblah....' thing covered. We would have never gotten Garet out of that place." Isaac said.

"I heard that!" Sheba yelled.

"And what're you gonna do about it helmet head?" (refrence to her odly shaped haircut there) Isaac moked.

Sheba's eyes flashed with lightning as her face grew an evilish, angry expression. Moments later, Isaac was struck with as much electricity as Hoover Dam makes in a year. He was never found again.

......until he spontaneously reassembled himself. A new hero was born! One with the power to do good! To fight justice!.....to be pantsed by every jock in highschool! He was.....a nerd!

End of short story #2

"Hey, you do know what happens after years of spiked milk, right?" Jenna asked.

"No......" Isaac replied.

"I'm sure you'll catch the scent of what I mean eventually." Jenna replied.

~~~

The group had finally reached Loho, and Isaac pulled up his pants for the 100th time since yesterday.

"Isaac, you look like a nerd. Pant's are meant to be worn around the waist, not the belly button." Jenna bluntly pointed out.

"Time to vanquish these foo's!" Piers said crossarmed with his mohawk and blingage.

"Smurfs! BATTLE FORMATION!!" Yelled Papa Smurf.

The short, but spry residents of Loho Lined up in 10 X 10 squares around their enemy with catapults ready.

One Smurf ran to catch up to the army, and Smurfette could be seen in the distance wearing a bead sheet, standing in the doorway of a mushroom.

"Whoa there short stuff. We're 6 feet tall and have a human dog. You don't stand a chance!" Isaac said.

One smurf ran up to Isaac and kicked him in the shin.

"Ow!"

"Isaac, you're pathetic."

[/chapter 22]

By the way, what ever happened to the whole "IHOP Conspiracy thing?"

[Platinum Sun]

I think the IHOP conspiracy became Old'd, but if your past work is any indication, that's no reason for you to stop milking it.

[Ironsight]

the delay was so long that i think me and PS are the only ones ready this (for now). i think you might be going some were with this Smurf thing though.

[Toasty]

Platinum Sun, on Apr 25 2007, 03:18 PM, said:

but if your past work is any indication, that's no reason for you to stop milking it.

What's that supposed to mean?

[Platinum Sun]

It's supposed to mean that you have a tendancy to overwork certain themes until they are cliched and aren't funny anymore. Am I going to have to explain everything I say? Because I like leaving things open to interpretation occasionally.

[Toasty]

Pfft. Like toast was ever "overworked." .....<.<;

[FlamingDuck]

Or Jenna beating people up. We really need a plot line, or else this thing'll just die.

[Sea of Time]

It's dead already. Using the same joke for 21 pointless chapters got really old.

[FlamingDuck]

Good point.

Maybe we should give it rest.

[Toasty]

Meh.

I'd still like to see SoT make at least ONE chapter. -_-

[Aquamarine]

I don't think you should give it a rest, just be a little bit more motivated when writing the chapters. Think a little about 'em before you start writing 'em and things may become a bit more original and funnier.

[FlamingDuck]

But you really need something to write about. I'm very tempted to do a Choose Your Own Adventure chapter...It'll be kicky!

[Toasty]

That'd be interesting, but it'd definately take a little while.

List of overused jokes/plotlines:

• Toast
  
• Toasters
  
• IHOP
  
• Pancakes
  
• Jenna hitting people
  
• Alternate Universes

List of underused things and or stuff:

• Mia (she hasn't appeared in a while)
  
• ....I'm at a loss of other stuff.

I'm open for suggestions.

This post has been edited by Mr.T: 04 May 2007 - 07:21 PM

[FlamingDuck]

We need some new source material. And suggestions are no fun, because then everyone knows what will happen!

[Toasty]

I'm more interested in suggestions for what we've overused really. If I've learned anything while writing this, than it's that other peoples opinions are better noted than discarded.

That, and I'm too lazy to go and re-read all 22 chapters.

Sooo.....No toast, no IHOP, and Jenna needs a straight-jacket (to withstrain her arms, of course!).

[Platinum Sun]

And you may want to restore normal reality at some point. The alternate dimension thing was cool, and the trip to Loho reminded me of Gulliver's Travels a little, but sometimes things are funnier back here on Earth.

[Toasty]

*edits list*

Might I remind you though, that this whole thing *save for the trip to teh other dimension* has taken place in Weyard, and Loho is of course in Weyard.

I think we should rap up the Smurf's destruction in the next one or two chapters, and try to figure out something else to use as a plot device.

But that's the harder aspect of comedic stories. They tend to eat up plot devices like Al Gore's house devours electricity (keep in mind he uses 20 times more than everyone else).